Death? Again? Noooo….

I’m having lots of trouble sleeping. You? The mind races with thoughts about SAD, Trump, America, Social Security, Medicare, apartments, homes, health, and an ex-girlfriend whose hurtful actions can’t be forgiven

At age 73, shouldn’t another word be on that list?

As my mind raced last night that word popped into my head: Death. Wide awake and ruminating away about everything except…death (small d, this time, see the difference?).

The realization mortality was not part of my late night consternation festival kind of made me happy. Maybe, pleased with myself is a better description. Death is a constant companion in old age. When the news reports an actor’s death at 69, or the retired sports star’s life ends at 72, one can not help but think he, me, is lucky to be able to hear the news. Going to bed isn’t accompanied by the hope of waking up alive, but it is a subtext, especially if dying in your sleep is your preferred method of reaching the afterlife.

Sidebar: All morning a thought from last night has been escaping me. An important thought, I thought, but obviously not important enough for me to get out of bed and write it down. In the above paragraph it revealed itself, so I’ll share, plus many thanks to my slowing brain for not deleting the idea and making me work for it. The thought: When you die in your sleep, do you know you’re dying? Or is death just an eternal extension of sleep? Imagine being shot or stabbed, or suffering from a mortal illness. You spend at least a few moments knowing it is the end, don’t you? You may even spend minutes, hours, or days getting ready for the final breath…wishing things were different.

After reading the sidebar, it appears Death/death did enter nighttime, cranial ramblings, albeit, in a Dr. Steven Wright kind of way.

Of course, the whole point of this essay is how funny the mind works so this writing can be accepted as cogent.

Okay, I agree with myself except for the fact “cogent” refers to a well-stated “argument or case, one that is clear, logical and convincing.” So says the Oxford people. But I just read back through this jumble and can’t see anywhere a “case” or “argument” has been made.  For or against anything. Does that make the entire exercise pointless?

Let’s go with a “yes”, because an answer makes a case, makes an argument, and my inability to focus and write an essay sensible and informative suddenly becomes indisputable. I knock over your King.

With a re-read and hindsight, this gibberish fits the style of our modern news, anyway. I’m topical!

And relevant.

The real villain is SAD. “Seasonal Affective Disorder” is a real thing. A long, never-ending winter in Upstate New York is the cause. It’s been over 20 years since my life was “snowed under” by weather that saps the soul, steals the “joie de vive”, and makes an Independent Liberal long for Florida.

It won’t happen again.

My Two Brains

For many years, now I’ve wondered if there are two brains in the body. You, too?

My vacation to the Warm South was meant to be a break from the Winter North, but also to test hopefully repaired, rejuvenated, and reclaimed physical abilities. It was during this testing, the “proof” of my second brain was finally revealed.

There have always been internal conversations–such as the infinitely confusing argument between doing good or doing bad–but I assumed those discussions were a normal personality abnormality, simple sophistry inspired by too much Devil’s Advocacy during young, formative years. It would go away with time and maturity, and the accumulation of wisdom. But the second brain discovered in North Carolina last week is different, it actually-,better tell the discovery story, first.

Sometime in the mid-morning hours of Thursday, March 27, 2025, I was in a Happy Place: a public tennis court surrounded by tennis players my own age. It was a time to celebrate recovery, patience, and give the beleaguered medical corporate establishment some credit for good work. The early moments were a time full of insults, name-calling, trash-talking, and too many hugs, all of which were greatly appreciated. Sadly, the second brain discovery happened only moments after actual physical activity was perpetrated. Yes, perpetrated. Perfect word for what happened. Look it up.

A now ex-friend hit a soon to be outlawed (hopefully) shot called a “Drop Shot”. For the un-tennis among you, the Drop Shot is a nasty trick played on mature, semi-immobile tennis players by younger, fully mobile tennis players. Given the abundance of gray hair and joint braces this morning, there was no expectation any one of us would ever have to face such a nasty play. I felt especially free from worry as I was recovering, attempting to resurrect my game, and open to any special treatment benefiting my progress. In a later post we will discuss whether or not there is honor among septuagenarians. (Full disclosure, it was our groups lone octogenarian who hit the shot, so I’ve no legal basis for claim, if so inclined.)

The beginning of the unappreciated drop shot was quickly seen by my Big Skull Brain (BSB), and  BSB immediately broadcast the signal to the entire body to move forward at a rapid pace to get to the falling tennis ball before it hit the ground. Perfect. Just right. So far.

But the next thing to hit the ground was me. The “ground”, by the way, in public tennis courts is painted concrete.

If you are at all familiar with the saying “got out over the ends of my skies”, then no more explanation is needed. For the rest of you, as my BSB issued commands, some other, smaller brain not only cancelled those commands, but did it with prejudice. As I lay writhing on the ground/concrete watching the yellow ball bounce next to my skinned knee, a comment between my BSB and the other, smaller brain was overheard. It went like this: “Move? Hell, no. We ain’t going nowhere.”

And thus a mystery was solved: we do have two brains. At least I do. A naïve, uninformed person may say the smaller brain is located in the penis of a male and it is hard to argue they’d be wrong. We will not attempt to locate the female smaller brain or even make the argument the females are equipped with one. Utter discretion. And maybe one is all they need, anyway

That NC morning’s facts are: one brain said “go” and the other said “no”. My big skull appeared to follow BSB’s directive and moved forward. Parts of the upper body followed, but reluctantly, as if the debate between big and small brain was already happening and non-brain parts were confused about which command to follow. The penis theory might be right because the lower parts followed the small brain directive and pretty much stayed in the same spot, leaving my big skull, and upper trunk to accept gravity’s invitation and topple over, risking major injury if no more action was taken. Fortunately, some sort of “emergency” system (a THIRD brain??) kicked in and my arms extended to absorb most of the impact. The upper body rescued itself and rolled over, saving the heart and lungs for later abuse.

It’s as if the small brain was punished for its incalcitrant (sic) actions as most of the medical carnage was done to knees and lower extremities. Take that, small brain. Aside: why do skinned knees take so long to heal?

You can understand how hurt BSB was, but it did a masterful job of pretending not to be hurt and graciously accepted every ounce of empathy.

It was a distracted drive home with the constant stream of debate between brains. I tried not to listen but did hear the word “insurrection” more than once.

The one, major positive about aging is the things you learn about yourself. One positive, now is—with a second brain—all the bad things done in the past are not entirely my fault…are they?

We Are the Experts!

It’s been great fun since Trump took office, to read local letters to the editors in our local paper. Our city and county are relatively small, but we seem to have an inordinate number of experts and know-it-alls. Is it the same where you live? (I just started reading the local paper last year, when I moved to Trump Country.)

As a natural troublemaker and aspiring (since birth) Devil’s Advocate, parrying with local wits is enjoyable, entertaining, and often enlightening. My only responses are to those who write and profess, or hint at the fact they are smarter than everyone else. The local author who “knows how to solve the immigration crisis”, for example. Or the modest intellect who tries to support an idea using phrases and verbiage “copied” from what ever information silo they inhabit.

Intellectual Curiosity (IC) has been discussed here, before, and it is the root of all the merriment. Anyone who believes in Trump is an idiot. Don’t blow a gasket, yet, because anyone who believes in Biden was/is an idiot, too. Or Obama, Or Bush, Or Clinton. Or the elder Bush. Sadly, I can strike up a spirited and eventually personal debate about any one of them with certain letter writers. You can support them, but you shouldn’t adore them. They’re humans. And don’t give up your IC.

We need to start with the definition, the urban definition, of what politicians are: they are people who want you to hire them for a job. The “job” is not lawn maintenance, but a job where complicated, personal, and impactful decisions about the direction of the city, county, state, and nation (and world?) are decided. And the politicians are asking you to send them to an institution where it takes more than one person’s will to get something done. More on that in a later post.

We vote almost every year for one sort of politician or another and a majority of Americans just don’t vote. In the last election 77 million voted for Trump, and 75 million voted against Trump. According to internet sources, most of the “Voting Eligible Population (VEP)” of the United States, about 89 million people, did not vote. (Note: VEP 244,666,890** per US News. Do your own math.) More people DID NOT VOTE, than voted for either candidate.

A smart person can see neither party presented a candidate that appealed to at least half the population. So, what does it mean when we say we “hate Joe Biden” or we “hate Donald Trump”? Is it a rational hate or a tribal hate?

Got way off track, but the point is most politicians (if not all) spend most of their time trying to convince YOU to vote for them. And once you do, they tend to start looking ahead to the next election. It’s a mistake if anything ever gets down. When IC kicks in, you begin to question the whole system, and not in a good way. Maybe those 89 million people know something.

The solution? Outlaw “homogenous” voting. The two-Party system demands you vote with (or against) one party or the other…no matter the issue! Ever hear of “Majority and Minority Whips? Guess what they’re supposed to do. It really is a wonder the government has survived for 200 and some years.

Mixed in with all this nonsense are the experts and arm-chair quarterbacks who know all about everything. In a local locker room one time, two guys were commiserating about how bad America looks to other counties. “We aren’t respected anymore.” When I asked if either had ever been to another country, or had friends in another country, or could even name another country…silence.

While it is great fun to poke and prod the local geniuses, I’ve been fortunate to never have to express my own opinions. Sounds like a cop-out, right? But my own opinions are not party-oriented or any particular color. And I don’t truly know half of what I say about issues since I’m not personally in the middle of them. I just know what I think I know. I’m not sure, for example, why SignalGate happened, but know we’ll learn more from the fuss after an issue than we knew before, so pay attention. IC.

I am afraid to state my own beliefs, too, because they are too naïve. Too Jimmy Stewart, too “Mr. Smith Goes to Washington.” They are easy to make fun of in a world full of experts and internet snipers.

So, I’ll continue trying to pop other’s balloons and wait for the world to get its act together. It’s only been about 55 years, so far, but what else is there to do?

** Numbers for 2024. VEP includes all legal American citizen over the legal voting age. Note that only 160 million are “registered” to vote. A few VEPs might be way beyond that legal age, so…

Back from Vacation, days away, free from you know what…

Then, my first trip to the news sites reeled me right back into the scrum.

The days were sunny, warm, and intellectually active in North Carolina. Except for the pollen and shady activity going on in the back parking lot of the hotel, it was a great week. Even the drive down and back was okay, far better than the mental struggle it usually is.

So, what harshed my mellow? Fox News. They ran a real, thoughtful, cranky story about a businessman in the south whose pole is too big. (Stop giggling.) And so is what he puts on his pole. Who says so, pink-haired, tree-hugging, liberal elites? Nope. The towns and cities he does business in around the southeast. The southeast. Not typical regulatory-maze country.

Jim, the businessman wants to show his patriotism by erecting giant poles with giant American flags on them. He says he has 100’s of thousands of square feet of American Flags he wants to spread around the country, to honor America, and show his thankfulness.

Jim and the eager beaver Fox news host are astounded that Jim is having trouble with various cities about the poles. And sometimes the flags. It’s a national story of interest, now. On Fox.

And there is the MAGA movement’s mentality in a nutshell. See, the cities and towns have local ordinances about how high your poles can be and–often–about how big the flags (or signs) can be, too. Again, this in in Tennessee, North Carolina, and other southern states Jim didn’t mention. Not your liberal snowflake, woke states.

The problem is that Jim doesn’t care about regulations. Rules are not for him. He’s a self-made man (very commendable, by the way) but for some reason he thinks that grants him the right to do what he wants. Fox’s, eager beaver kind of nods in agreement.

This wouldn’t be such a big deal but it’s Jim’s reasoning that sets him apart: he wants to honor America, not himself, by erecting larger than regulation flag poles and flying larger than regulation flags.

Let’s forget a better use of his money might be helping the poor in his communities. Or contributing to conservative causes and politicians. Or helping feed the hungry. Flags just flap in the breeze. (Unknown, but maybe he does do that kind of good work, too, in addition to his Flag Life.)

But isn’t it a better way to honor America, a better way to thank this country, isn’t it a better thing to obey the rules and regulations of the places you choose to work in, make money in, and live in? Wouldn’t respecting the local ordinances of the town folk be a better way to show your gratitude for America? Be a defender and believer and supporter of the community, not a troublemaker?

Jim needs to hear what he is saying with his words, a constant complaint about MAGA. He loves America, wants to fly flags, for America, honor America…but gosh darn it, no one is going to tell him how to do it. He’s doing it his way or legions of lawyers will become wealthy for no good reason.

It’s the theory of male exceptionalism (no caps on purpose) that dominates the right wing of our country. Rules and regulations are for normal people. Not us exceptional people. Wonder how many businesses in Jim’s home town researched the rules about flags/signs and did it the right way, the way the local citizens and government want? Or maybe they said, “screw it, we don’t need more flags, anyway.”

I like Jim’s idea about spreading patriotism around the United States. But why can’t he do to code? Why does he need to fight for a bigger pole, a bigger flag, than everyone else? Care to guess?

America is what it is because of Exceptional People (caps on purpose): War heroes, explorers, inventors, and the daily Exceptionalism by cops, doctors, firemen, teachers, et.al.

But America has lasted so long, done so well, because we are a nation of laws, regulations, and the stability laws and regulations bring. And Americans believe in law and order. I’ll bet a majority of American drivers obey the speed limit. We all know those exceptional drivers who don’t. Like them much?

Honestly, of all the things to take a patriotic stand on: the height of your flag pole?

Honoring your town and it’s laws is more patriotic than adding a few feet to your pole. (Typed with a straight face. Honest.)

Music. Jackson Browne. The Brothers Comatose. Serendipity.

The last post about waking up in the middle of the night? Anxious? Distraught? Possibly even in despair? A lead-in to depression?

Ha.

A fortuitous click/flick on a Samsung phone yielded a Youtube video of The Brothers Comatose performing Jackson Browne’s “These Days”.

If you are at all unhappy with life, politics, a cruel ex-girlfriend, or calamities of any kind…find this video. As a strong, modern American, internally fortitudely (sic, for the entire sentence) secure man, I cried. After 10 plays, still crying.

Music has the power, seemingly the duty to save us from…everything. A good poem helps us. A good tune helps us. But a great song? It heals. Alters the mind. Makes life better. Not just better, but wonderfully okay, euphorically livable. Especially in old age.

I’ve written about Jackson Browne (JB) before, and how many males my age grew up with his music, his fantastically, emotionally pertinent music. You can hear almost his entire, 60 year, lifetime catalogue—done by him—performed differently in every decade since 1970. You can also hear most of his catalogue covered by DIFFERENT artists in every decade since 1970. A lot of the great 60’s and 70’s acts have such an emotional power for us, The Aging Man and Woman. For you, it might be someone else. Definitely someone else for you younger readers.

The power of this type of music is amazing, whoever it is, whenever you hear it. God’s gift to us.

“These Days” was written by JB when he was 16 and recorded by Nico in 1967. AI says the song deals with “loss and regret”. I’ve listened every decade, since.

The Brothers Comatose have covered “These Days” more than perfectly, more than respectfully. They turned it into a divine version so singularly apt for the time I accidentally found it, when it was needed most, as if their version was meant for me, alone, at this time in my life. Serendipity. Karma. Providence. (The Brothers Comatose did the same thing to Neil Young’s “Harvest Moon”, a performance I rely on, frequently, for mood settling and the overall restoration of good feelings.)

It is a hope that you, the individual, unique, one-of-a-kind reader, has something similar in your life.

One of the problems, however, is remembering you have this power to turn to in time of need. If I’d have listened to “Harvest Moon”  last night, for example, instead of memorializing my angst in writing, well…

Now I have JB, The Brothers Comatose, and the rest for comfort. How fortunate is that? Bring it on, Trusk…and the rest of life.

JB can be watched from the early days, when he was a young, handsome man, all the way up to now, age 76 in 2025. While interesting to view, does it make JB, himself, sad/happy/unsure to see himself age?

JB’s voice is gruffly pleasant to some, but not to others. It is intriguing, then to hear his songs covered by females like Bonnie Raittt, Linda Ronstadt, Nico, Allison Krause, and AJ Lee. They all—and others—have the power to add emotional depth to every JB song they perform. See Bonnie’s version of JB’s “My Opening Farewell”.

An interesting video, too, is JB and Gregg Allmann “outgruffing” each other on a live version of The Allmans Brothers’ “Melissa” from ten years ago. It is a spectacular live performance.

It’s 3 am and it has taken three hours to type this short post. Damn music videos. It appears there are many things in my life to be thankful for, many blessings to appreciate.

Calamities, Trump, deceitful girlfriend, and every single problem Old Age can throw at me, be damned. Oh, and death. Screw ‘em all.

My new motto? Devour Feculance. (Thank you, Mr. Milchick.)

And thanks to all the great artists who have accepted their gifts and shared them with us, the rest of the world.

America, the beautiful? The Great?

I awoke in the middle of the night, alarmed, then saddened, then in a panic about America. It’s a place I’ve inhabited and loved and criticized, demonstrated against and then accepted, but always a country with the historic ability to survive the worst impulses of each new generation. We will survive.

But this time? I no longer see the Trump presidency as a 4-year pandemic we will recover from when the political system resets itself and heals its wounds.

In 12 months, or less, our democratic (Small “d”) political system will no longer exist. The Republican Party, historically a dedicated and patriotic foe of the Democratic Party, is already extinct.

Trump is putting in place Billionaire yes-men/women who will do whatever he wants. (If they aren’t billionaires when Trump appointed them, they may be soon.)  At the same time, he is destroying, neutering, and obliterating any person, department, or institution standing in his way. And he’s doing it at record speed, getting everything in place to defy the 2026 midterms.

His press secretary reveals the plan with every statement she makes: obscure, deny, deflect and counter attack every, single truth. Her job description? Truth will be what she is told to say it is. Trump put her in place to render the free press ineffective. That “free press” cannot handle someone who lies, distorts, and fabricates so much the press cannot keep pace. As the free press spins in circles over here, Trump does what he wants over there.

The Trump Plan involves a massive amount of snookery and public-facing deception. The sheer volume of lies and atrocious behavior will overwhelm the 260 million people who did not vote for him in 2024, and they will wear down, look away, and allow him to do what he wants. It’s a form of public, Chinese Water Torture.

Most Americans do not realize the extent of the changes already made. DOGE is not a government efficiency finder, but a money finder and re-applier. Stop spending money on Voice of America and spend that “saved” money on bribes to foreign countries to take back immigrants. Spend formerly legally appropriated money on illegal activities like flying “terrorists” back to any country receiving the Trump Bribes. (Why else would El Salvador accept hundreds of Venezuelan gang members?  And will these “terrorists” be released back into the world if Trump’s bribes stop? Is it possible our newly-muscled border watchers will see these terrorists, again? Are the deportees even terrorists/gang members? Do you know?

And the March 21, 2025 $20 Billion Trump just gave Boeing for the new F-47 Fighter? Here’s a transparent description of the total cost from Trump, himself: “We’ve given an order for a lot. We can’t tell you the price.”

DOGE? Attack!

Billionaires are buying into the Trump Agenda because they see lower taxes, less regulation, and ultimately the ability to do whatever they want, when ever they want to do it.

And this will go on for at least four years, or until The King dies of natural causes. Then, the fight for the crown will lead to more Un-American activities until a new king is crowned.

Is this what 77 million voters wanted?

Even today, after 2 months of the expedited plan, the average, Fox-informed American will say “Yes.”

So be it. As they like to say, “Elections have consequences.”

Recently, Stephen Miller was on Fox News calling one of his critics a “moron”,  a “degenerate”, and “stupid”. The lame stream, mainstream, legacy media Fox News presenter just giggled. Yes, Fox is lame-steam, mainstream media.

On the comedy side of things: as Trump, Miller, Musk, and related antagonists invent new monikers for all who disagree with them, Musk threatens lawsuits for someone calling him names. And Trump settles old grudges with the unlimited, emperor-like powers Trump says voters granted him. And the Supremes** will back him up.

Make America Grate Again.

Believe this if you can: I hope I’m wrong. Really, really, wrong. I fervently hope this post is just more of the Trump Derangement Syndrome, the mental condition a Minnesota Republican lawmaker wants to write into law.

Bet I’d be happier about things if I was deranged. For fun, look up the “Oxford Languages” definition for deranged. It will sound familiar…like someone we all know…

** Apologies to Diana Ross and the rest.

Somethings I Wonder About….

Why on God’s green earth aren’t there more days like the ones in late March or early April when the sun comes out, the sky is blue, the weather warm, and the world is full of promise? God KNOWS, we could use them. Italics mine and on purpose. The squeaky wheel gets greased.

My weekly surrender of $5 to the insidious, flinty one-armed-bandits at Turning Stone Resort and Casino didn’t work out the way Casino management planned, this morning. I put my $5 bill in the slot, played my 40 cent bet,…and the machine exploded! When the dust cleared and sirens stopped, I’d won a total of $9.50. I cashed out my $14.50 and went to breakfast at Emerald in the casino. It didn’t ruin my morning, but the price of the NY Cheese and 3 Egg Omelet was no longer last week’s $12. It is now $15.12 cents with tax. Yes, I tipped well and the day is still the best one of the year…so far. A related, no-criticizing question: when will the price of eggs go down?

It is apparent the body is affected by weather, and as noted in the first paragraph, this morning is a good morning. The 72 going on 73 year old aches and pains accepted daily as a fact of life overslept this morning. They didn’t show up for work. It is always wonderful when days like this happen. Knock on wood so it lasts all day.

As a young man I chased a romantic ideal probably consistent with most young man. The result was several close calls but nothing like The Ideal. And, as with most young men, the “ideal” changed through the years so what I might like to find now, in a partner bears no resemblance to the younger hope. Please note we are not talking simply physical ideals. It was an early lesson learned that packaging is only part of the person. Do women learn the same lesson? Anyway, the thing generating wonder, here, is the thought of how many of the young who fell short of the young Ideal, would be perfect for the new, older Ideal. To put it another way: did the quest for an ideal at 20 lead me to pass by the one who would have been ideal at 72? The first thought is yes, and it makes me want to apologize to certain females. Sadly, some might not be alive. If a second thought surfaces, I’ll let you know.

There was a beautiful, little movie on TV yesterday called “77 Chances”. DirectTV has replaced YouTube TV as my main TV content provider and I was checking out the channels. My water glass needed filling while passing a “Christian” themed station, and the movie hooked me before I could change the channel. Look it up. It’s about “point of view”, mainly, and the movie made me a little happier for the time spent with it. No guns. No Ninjas. No heroes. Just people. Of note, if it matters, it is low budget, in a good way.

And that leads into the concept of heroes and the modern, American male/hero. I’ve said so often the MAGA movement is about insecurity, and we see it every day with the whining and blaming and spite suddenly integral parts of our governmental discourse. Long story shortened: there are many heroes on TV these days who are not insecure, who can take criticism without firing a shot, and who never lose confidence in doing what is right instead of just talking about it. John Wick. Longmire. Raylan Givens.  Edward Horniman. Colter Shaw. Heroes with empathy, not insecurity. Not sure about the actors, but kudos to the writers and actors for stylish, intelligent, charismatic, likable action figures.

Nap time…perchance to dream…

A Few of the Many Things I Don’t Understand

Why do things fall from my hands so easily? It was much easier to pick them up when I was younger, so why didn’t they fall, then?

With a population of 340 million people, why do 77 million voters keep saying they “represent all of America”? Don’t the other 263 million people matter?

Where DOES time go? I’ve never heard anyone answer.

Could there be more than one “soulmate” in someone’s life? Follow up question (FUQ): How could a man get married a THIRD time without learning his lesson after the second?

Why does a person who does something stupid work so hard to deny it? FUQ (Yes, I know what it sounds like. Stop giggling.): Is it because they are stupid?

Why do we elect popular people for Prom King and President? FUQ: Are females just not popular? Are smart, intelligent, experienced candidates persona non grata? Like the television show, “Survivor”, are they too much of a threat?

A baseball player for “the other New York Team” will make $51 million dollars per year to play baseball. Is it a coincidence it is same amount as the entire annual budget for the city in Upstate NY where I live? Definite FUQ up: Could the player adopt the city and support us?

When someone says, “be cool”, do they have a specific temperature in mind? FUQ: Be “chill”? I’ve never been able to agree on temperature with anyone I ever lived with so…

Why do conservatives whine so much about “Main Stream” and “Legacy Media”? Isn’t Fox News Legacy Media? Fox is definitely “main stream”. Okay, Fox is lame. FUQ: Do Fox viewers know Fox was designed to be biased. On purpose. To counter other bias. Another FUQ: Do two wrong bias’ make a right? Do they offset? Should we be watching the cartoon network for news?

Why are sports teams so insensitive? March Madness is here. I predict two teams will fight like cats and dogs during a hard-fought, entertaining, exhausting game and when it’s over,…hate each other. In the old days (OD), in the YMCA gyms, we fought like cats and dogs and then went out for beers. Ah, the OD.

When did money take over the world? At least the American world. There are more ways to make money without making anything, now. They call it passive income. In the OD if you couldn’t shoe a horse, sew up as wound, or kill another man before he killed you, you were out of luck. Now, if you put some horse-shoeing income in a tax-deferred account, invest it in ETF’s, and sell high and buy low…huh. Maybe that is productive work.

Why does the body fall apart, wither, and die? FUQ: Is there any way to guarantee our mind won’t leave us before the body does?

Sorry about those two…

Why do all the people in old photographs look so unhappy? Was it their nature or the inconvenience of having to stay immobile long enough for the film to work?

Life must have been hard in the real OD. Thinking of how hard it would be, for example, to wipe your butt with a Montgomery Ward Catalogue page. Or a leaf. Maybe they never went to the bathroom. Ken Burns could make a documentary about defecation and urination. FUQ: How many people have died over the course of history?

Enough. It’s sad to write about some things…

Men, Money, and…Corruption?

Spring is near and it is bringing with it a sense of humor. Thank God.

I stumbled across this quote from a 96 year-old man who sounds liberal, but truth often sounds liberal: “The world is a mysterious and confusing place. If you are not willing to be confused, you become a mere replica of someone else’s mind.” -Noah Chomsky.

How funny is that?

You may have read here, ad nauseum, Americans have gotten so smart about everything. Sadly, the less education you have the more you know as experts are overly educated and dangerous. Come on, we have a billionaire, reality TV star as President now. If that’s not funny…

Now, after the above quote and my newly recovered sense of humor, it makes sense why people being smart bothers me: they’re missing out on life and ruining it for the rest of us who are confused.

An earlier Steven Wright line (Dr. Steven Wirght, BTW) ties it together precisely: “A conclusion is the place where you get tired of thinking.”

Americans are really, really tired of thinking.

Here’s an exercise for us all. Find someone with your opposite views of the world and try to talk like them. Sean Hannity and Alina Habba have done it perfectly ironically in their latest remarks on Fox. Google it and watch them snicker about stupid “other people”. It’ll make you laugh so hard you’ll gag.

MAGAns will conclude who the Other People are. Democrats may conclude the opposite. And away we go. Conclusions.

There is merit in knowing how little you know, and you can make a living at it. Ask Christopher Lloyd who does it on purpose, and Sarah Palin. Wait, just Christopher. (All young people google Taxi.)

What does all this have to do with Men? And Money?

Our Capitalist monetary system makes it easy for greedy Men with no conscience to make tons of money off people who “reached conclusions”. Trump merchandising is an obvious example, but the Left’s examples are subtler, and just as pernicious. (A couple weeks ago, an email from The Harris “something” asking for money to pay off bills. There should be a charge for spam mail.)

And when Men make money, what do they do? They make more money. I had a good laugh this week when a news pundit said: “billionaires don’t care about making more money”. It’s funny because that is exactly what they do care about. I’d have been happy with the first million. But men are greedy. (Don’t ask, I know what you’re thinking. Blame J D Salinger and “A Perfect Day For Bananafish.” Do I have to say “google it” anymore? Aren’t you curious about how much you don’t know?)

The sad thing about greed is its ignorance of barriers. Men, again, take great delight in stepping over barriers, obliterating them, or in the modern case, re-defiling them, redefining them, I mean. One of our billionaire’s first firings were Inspector Generals in all Departments, the guys who were already investigating corruption. DOGE says they weren’t doing the job, right, I guess, so now Federal investigations into Trump are closed, as are the investigations into Musk, For good measure, Musk took out the CFPB and ended their investigations, as well.

I love the smell of Rooting Out Corruption early in a pre-spring morning. Humor. Pre-Spring hilarity. But not a single word about Corruption from DOGE. Is it just me or do you NOT hear the word, too? Waste, fraud, and abuse. By the billions. Corruption? None.

Most of the biggest scams in American History were perpetrated by men. Madoff. The Entire 2008 Financial Disaster. Tammany Hall. Enron. The Teapot Dome Scandal. Jim Jones.

Here’s another funny part: according to politicians welfare cheats are ruining our beloved country. And that damn Health Care for all idea…gotta go.

Maybe I google too much. Or I’m even dumber than I know I think I am…

Time for some conclusions.

It’s Been A Bad Year…Thanks, Mr. Wright!

2025 has not been kind. Yet. It might be though, right? Eventually?

It began well with a great lead in from December: hip replacement surgery ended years of pain, cancer is in remission, and AMD is stopped in its tracks. Great end to 2024 and lead in to “The Next Year.”

Hip recovery went swimmingly but New York’s 2025 weather prohibited a normal “scale-up” of activities. Venturing into winter weather with a new hip was compounded by the worst winter weather in upstate NY in 60 years. Outdoor recreational mobility/recovery was DENIED, even as the maintenance gurus of the apartment complex–the salters, shovelers, skid-steer operators who, bless their hearts—did yeoman’s work scraping out a few minutes a day for safe walking. What exactly is a “yeoman”? Be right back.

Yeoman: “a man holding and cultivating a small, landed, estate” among other things listed in the Oxford Dictionary.  Lots more, too.

Shortened story: stuck inside for months with a good hip and nowhere to go. But I did find an antidote to the malaise 2025 is intent on dropping me into: The wise words of Dr. Steven Wright. (I awarded him an honorary degree.) Dr. Wright told me through the printed collection of his sayings “Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.”

Hm.

Then Trump took office. I made a new year’s resolution not to write about him, but he does so much…how did he get elected? Maybe, per the good doc, “The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese”.  Think about it…

Dr. Wright: “Half the people you know are below average.” What? And an explanation: “82.47% of statistics are made up on the spot.” A concisely contemporary, pure propagation of punditry.

It’s concerning to me that our current political shenanigans don’t make me laugh, anymore. There must have been a very sad, recent shift in my attitude towards our political class. Un-humorous worry is a constant companion. Dr. Wright, help please?

““My mechanic told me, “I can’t repair you brakes so I made your horn louder.”” Note: Double quotation marks are grammatical, not ironic.

Perfect.

As a sidebar, he reminded me: “The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.”

Dr. Wright also helped me understand most of our current politicians, and how they can live with themselves: “A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.”

And for all of loyal, fanatical, know—it—all online Demoncrats and Repugnicans, “A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.”

No more politics. Back to me. New advice?

“The sooner you fall behind, the more time you have to catch up”, he offers.

Okay. I’m better. You?

Remember this, too, “Eagles may soar, but weasels don’t get sucked into jet engines.”

And if any of this did not make your day better, here’s consolation in Dr. Wright’s words: “If at first you don’t succeed, destroy all evidence you tried.”

Full disclosure: Steven Wright is not really a doctor, but he should play one on TV.

Next posting we will attempt to answer the age-old Wright question: “What is the speed of dark?”

Contributions and comments welcomed.