sports

What in the World Is Going On?

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That should read “What is Going On in the World?” You have any idea?

Money and wealth are distorting the natural order of things all over this wonderful globe. You learned about Dynamic Model Pricing a few weeks ago and how money changes fair trade. An article on the web showed how many is entering politics in ever increasing levels, since the Supreme Court decreed “Corporations are People, too” and can contribute like you or me. That was 2013, and the infamous Citizens United Ruling. So you contribute $100 to your favorite candidate. XYZ Corporation contributes $1 million. Who does your candidate favor? Google how campaigns were financed before 2013. It was complicated but fair for all. Now, money pays and money plays.* Say it isn’t so.

But the real mess is geo-political. Donald Trump has shaken up the world and this is going to be the result: Three Super Nations will rule the world in 20 years. Russia will take over Europe and most of the Middle East, China will get all the Asian nations, including Taiwan, and to Make America Great Again, we get the entire western Hemisphere. Australia, New Zealand and Africa are up for grabs, probably the last places where opposing armed forces will fight. Proof? Who wants Greenland, is talking about other Latin American conquests, and is cultivating a friendship with Argentina? Trump. Us. Who is cutting off aid, and probably support, to Europe? Us. Who has already entered a European neighbor to take over territory? Putin. Who is instigating and threatening military action in the Pacific, including building entire new islands to block traditional shipping lanes? China and Xi.

Trump is often accused of being friendly to Putin and recently backed off Chinese export tariffs.Is there a deal among the world’s three major powers? Is the world about to be partitioned into negotiated sections for each? Will that be a bad thing?

Xi and Putin are already autocratic rulers, so what do they need? Xi and Putin need an autocratic ruler in the United States. Who would even think of anything this huuuge(sic) but Trump, The Deal Maker?** With hindsight and some insight, you can see the trail of this conspiracy beginning before the 2016 election of Trump. He made many trips to Moscow trying to get a hotel built, but it was denied…for the moment. Then, there are the rumors of Russian support for not only the election of Trump but financing for his wife’s documentary/movie. Did Russia put up the money? And Trump repeatedly inserts himself into business deals with China, as if he is the only one who can negotiate with Xi. And don’t forget Trump’s best buddy, South Korea’s dictator and Xi puppet.

If Trump can pull off getting himself the same power as Putin and Xi, the Three Super Nations can form and rule forever. Note the imposition of Martial Law would be a first step towards that power, especially if “civil unrest” reaches a certain, justifiable level. (Wink Wink: Minnesota.)

Smaller countries, races, and ethnicity may or may not be destroyed. Putin, Xi, and Trump will hold so much power, there won’t be much that can harm them, so they may let us keep our native languages, religions, and customs. And SPORTS!

This is science fiction and I’ve no idea if anything in this post is true. Isn’t that the best part? But when you smell crap, there usually is crap. Where there’s smoke there’s fire. If it walks like a duck…it walks funny.

If you don’t hear from for a few weeks…there is a safety deposit box number…shouldn’t have mentioned that…

PS To anyone listening, I promise to never write about this, again. Ever. Promise. Pinky swear. The Secret is Safe.

 *It was probably the same pre-2013 but it was illegal.

**It might also be why he worked so hard to keep power in 2021. He let his buddies down.

Things Overheard During Football Games

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If you don’t care about football, move on…

Sports announcers have lost the ability to talk in complete sentences, let quiet moments be quiet, avoid pycho-babble, and simply make sense. And they love copy-catting (sic). At first, turning the sound off made sense, but was a comedy goldmine was being missed?

Let’s start with phrases all football announcers seem to use. See if they make any sense and picture hearing them every freaking game, three or four times.

“He’s got two time-outs in his pocket.” Confusing remark about game-time management and a coach with imaginary things stuck in real, small places. Meaning: “The team has two timeouts left.”

“He needs to dial-up the pressure.” Nice way of saying the defense sucks and the coach has to get “more pressurey(sic)”. Get it? Think, water, if you’re having trouble.

“He lives for this moment.” And its variant: “He’s dreamed of this moment since playing in the backyard.” Announcers’ projection about why some players play well when they need to play well. Not sure of a phrase used for those who don’t play well when they need to play well. “Choke?” Be nice if some announcer tried it.

“He’s very athletic.” This phrase is used by all sports announcers and let’s us know that as we watch high-level athletes perform they are…athletic. As of this date I have never heard of any football participant being called “unathletic”. It will be noted if it happens.*

“I don’t know what he was seeing, there.” Common phrase used by announcers, fans, and players when a quarterback throws an interception. It’s on this list because it is an honest, factual response but leads to former football players turned announcers trying to explain not only what the present player saw, but what the present player should have seen and done. Called “second-guessing” by normal people.

“He’s a leader in the locker room and has a high football-IQ.” It’s never apparent what the announcer is trying to tell us. Are most players not intelligent? Or is there a “streets smart” version of intelligence in football? Often, poor performing players are praised by the remark, and are usually let go or traded soon after. Sometimes, it refers to a very good player who is hurt but contributing on the side-line with general cheer-leader support, or actual “let’s look at the replay” technical support for his replacement. Most time the remark is generated—in my opinion—by a random comment made by a friend of the “leader”, or a self-serving sideline reporter question: “You’re a leader on this team what do you think of how bad your team is playing?” for example. It is often asked of any player who will take the time to answer.

“The coaches haven’t had time to get him up to speed.” Usually this is said about a top draft pick or trade who is under-performing. The statement refutes the importance of practice and coaching which leads to the question “What IS going on at practice?” It is especially pertinent in the professional ranks where it is their JOB.

We’re running out of room and haven’t addressed the worst announcer’s offence: Nonstop talking. It begins with announcing teams being two-man teams. ** One guy is supposed to “speak the game” presumably—and rightfully—so vision impaired fans know what is happening. The second guy is the “color guy” who provides insights and knowledge we might not know. It’s tough to manage talk time to begin with, but most “color” guys are ex-players or coaches intent on reshaping their legacy. They need to let us poor, non-playing souls know how smart they are. One of the “comic gold” times mentioned earlier is when altruistic time management gives way to two Alpha males and leads to nail-biting drama as both get as many words in the 40 seconds as they can before the ball is snapped for the next play. The time a quarterback approaches the line of scrimmage, evaluates the defense, and calls the correct play is a “Sacred Time” to all knowledgeable fans. *** Too often all we hear is bloviating announcers.

Last remark, promise ****. In a recent game a penalty was called on the team with the ball. The referee stated–to the entire stadium and television audience—”the ball will be placed half the distance from the start.” There was no further explication so don’t miss the complex humor.

*Imagine “choke” and “unathletic” being used at the same time. Makes sense.

**No woman, yet, in the NFL booths.

***In the “huddle” two plays are called. At The Sacred Time, The QB picks one.

****Never heard it before, and probably never will.

Expectations? Don’t Bother.

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In thinking about happiness and well-being, and after years of observation and self-testing, my conclusion is we are our own worst enemies. We get in the way of happiness by not seeing it when it’s there and by not pursuing it when it isn’t. The sentence sounds odd so take a moment to think about it…

I’ve been a New York Yankee fan since 1960. Sixty-two years. When you are a sports fan, you get to live the highs and lows of the teams’ results. Championship years and cellar-dwelling years, it’s all a package. Happy when the World Series ends in victory, banners raised, and sad in years they don’t make the Series, and the season is over with a whimper. It’s easy to see when happiness comes and when it doesn’t. They win, we’re happy. They lose, we’re not. Is there anything we can do about it? No, especially when we are a small child listening to every play on the radio. You actually experience happiness and despair, clearly defined and unavoidable. Damn Yankees.

So what does that have to do with anything? It’s easy to live with the happiness thrust upon you by your team winning, but what about the unhappiness of losing? Ah, there’s always next year. In baseball, the following spring brings hope for a better year, a hope for seasonal happiness, a hope for the World Series Ring. For a sports fan hope becomes an expectation. Before any new games are played, we do not hope the Yankees will be better, we assume to know the Yankees will be better, we expect it. And when the Yankees lose, we are unhappy because an expectation not realized makes us unhappy.

And there it is in black and white: expectations are the cause of unhappiness. The measured and regulated nature of sports makes it obvious, including the annual renewal of “expectation” no matter what happened last year. A common fan’s announcement after an unhappy, expectation-denying season is “never again will I root for them”, a vow only kept until next season begins with a new hope/expectation.

But the damage expectations do to our lives is harder to see in real life. Why are some of us unhappy? Something in life didn’t go as planned, didn’t happen as we expected it to happen, and there is no choice but to feel unhappy about it. Marriage doesn’t meet our expectations, we divorce. Friends don’t meet our expectations, we dump them. Even in our dining habits, if a restaurant doesn’t meet our expectations we unhappily decide not to dine there again. We expect a diet to work? Potential unhappiness. We expect to get a job? Meet the girl of our dreams? Become an influencer? Be like Taylor?

But it is not the action or inaction making us unhappy. Unhappiness comes from the destruction of expectation and how we process that destruction.

You want to be happy? Don’t expect anything. Ever. At all. Enjoy the terrible meal. Enjoy the Yankees losing. Enjoy your girlfriend dumping you. At least be ambivalent, but don’t be unhappy. And you can expand the process into your philosophy of life: don’t expect happiness and you won’t be unhappy when you’re not happy…?

A little hyperbole helps make a point until it veers off into absurdity. Hm. If you expect to understand what makes you happy and you never do, you’ll always be unhappy? Or happy you understand you’ll never be happy?

That’s it. You got it. Want to be happy? Just be happy. Let things be what they are. Do your best, but don’t expect it to be better than anyone else’s expectation, especially if it really is better.

Final example and possible escape from this mess: A young female student sits behind a young male in class. She constantly complains to him about not meeting the “right” guy. It takes her the entire school year to see her expectation of the right guy is wrong and the guy in front of her is The Right Guy. They fall in love and marry, something neither of them expected, though the guy did hope. (Don’t think too hard about this one. It’s a true story but a poor example.)

I took a shot of tart cherry juice to clear my head for the final, really final thought. Hope is one thing, but expectation is another, different thing. Find the hope all around you and you’ll find happiness anytime you want it. Let hope fester into an expectation, you lose control.

Keep hope alive. You can do it.

PS Hope this sloppiness helped someone…I expect to hear about it, too.

Soccer? Is it Futbol?

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Is there anyone in America who can explain soccer to me? In less time than a Cricket match?

Soccer is the most popular sport in the world according to “The World Atlas”, with about 3.5 billion fans. Where do you think baseball and American football are in the rankings?

Cricket is in second place with 2.5 billion, followed by Hockey, Tennis, Volleyball, TABLE Tennis, and finally Basketball at number 7 and Baseball at number 8. Rugby and Golf round out the top ten WORLD Sports.  Haven’t found real Football, yet.

Don’t quibble about who The World Atlas is and how they might know these facts. What intrigues me is the constant effort by Soccer to penetrate the United States sports scene. We do not have Cricket leagues that I know of, do we? Any of your office friends play cricket? Talk about Cricket? Is there a relationship between Cricket and the “sounds of Crickets”? Are there Cricket pools? Holy crap. Do NOT google “how long does an average Cricket match last?” A Test Match can last 5 days! Are there food trucks?

Screw Cricket and let’s get back to Soccer. I played a type of soccer in the third grade in the 1960s. Our teachers put up some orange cones, threw a round ball into the middle of the square the cones made, and watched us run around. Then they blew a whistle, and we all went back to our readin’, riting’, and rithmatic. (sic)

I see later versions of this game in a park lately, it being recognizable by the glom of children all running in a group in whatever way the ball bounced. They looked like a school of sardines.

But thanks to “Ted Lasso”, I’ve tried to learn more. I’m also a closet fan of The World Cup (TWC), an event, presumably, where countries field National Teams every four years and play an Olympic style Tournament. TWC began in 1930 and has been played every four years, since, excepting the WWII war years of 1942 and 1946. And every pizza parlor I’ve ever been in has at least one picture of an Italian team that won a TWC, if not all four teams.

AI says there are 193 countries in the world today. Wikipedia says over 211 teams are “eligible” to play in TWC. Interesting numbers needing an entirely different post and explanation.

As I understand it, “QUALIFYING” for TWC is an event all its own, with the world broken up into “6 Continental Zones” where matches are played with the winners moving on to different “stages”. The zones have mostly normal names like Europe, Africa, Asia, South America, but there is also a zone named “Oceania**”. By the time the fateful year rolls around, (currently 2026), 32 teams are left standing to compete for TWC.

I have to stop. Every fact I learn about soccer and TWC, leads to more questions. Qualifying rules, for example, are different from the rules used to play the games in the TWC final “stages”. Why?

          Enough. I’m a fan, and not knowing what the hell is happening is part of the allure of the game. So is the noise I hear when I find a foreign soccer match on TV. It appears all soccer fans are nuts. And noisy. After 125 years of competition. What is the secret to soccer’s massive, long-lasting, fanatical popularity? Outside the United States, that is?

          Sadly, I’m leaving this discussion worse off than when I began. There is still no answer to why some matches are “Friendlies” and others are called “Caps”. Or why there is no accurate, running clock. Soccer matches aren’t over when the clock on the screen runs out, they’re over when the guy running around the field, who never touches the ball, says it is over. Why do they KEEP playing during “stoppage time”?

          Ted Lasso had trouble understanding the soccer leagues where the Champions are the losers from the Premier League or something…And if a talented actor like Jason Sudeikis can’t understand it, what hope is there for me?

          One thing for sure, it will never be called Futbol in my house.

**Think of every small island in the Pacific Ocean: they are all in “Oceania”.

Interesting Things I’ve heard, lately

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There are so many sporting events these days, there is a dearth of announcing talent. In a recent game I heard an announcer say this with all the confidence of a man who knows everything: “You can bet (this player) won’t miss this foul shot. He’s a great free throw shooter. Made 52 percent of his shots so far this year.” For non-sports people 52% is NOT a good number and the shooter did miss the shot. In the same game: “You have to be impressed by their fight the first ten minutes of this second half. They’ve clawed their way back to within 8 points after being down by 8 at the end of the first half.” Most modern announcers not only speak to fill time, but also work hard to make you see how smart they are. Like this former football coach turned announcer: “If it were me, I’d never pass the (football) again. The (other team) is ready for it.” The “other team” wasn’t, probably thinking the same as the old coach? The first team passed and scored a long touchdown.

Its okay, but no one ever acknowledges being wrong. Or gets fired. Or turns down the check. Modern American values, these days.

Speaking of American Values, for some really interesting answers ask any MAGA/Trump supporter when was the last time America Was Great. If they answer, that is. Most babble and bash Biden. Or Obama.

Here’s an easy one. I’m looking at my wall of windows and all I see is white. I look at my weather app and see sunshine. No snow in the next ten days. Yes, I did double check to make sure the app was set to the right location. By the way, if I hadn’t and learned I hadn’t, an apology would be here, trust me. Truthfully, I would have just deleted this paragraph. No need for you to know how stupid I might be, is there?

Back to politics, and apologies for picking on Republicans, but they are the most egregious when it comes to memory loss, forcing them to give interesting answers. Dems do it too, but…so many Republicans have learned to not say a bad word about Trump they have lost all recollection of the January 6, 2021 riots…especially the ones who were actually there. When asked about The Pardons, the usual response has been: “I don’t know anything about that. But Biden was wrong.”

A recent politician brought up a Republican named Trey Gowdy. If you don’t remember him, he was mainly responsible for the $8 million spent on 52 congressional hearings into The Benghazi/Hilary Clinton fiasco. Mr. Gowdy was the usual lead attack dog during the hearings and now works for Fox, criticizing Democrats for wasting time and money on things like impeachment. He said this sometime in the past, probably during a Democratic President’s term: “Process matters. We are not a country where the ends justifies the means.” The Modern Republican Party thinks otherwise. J6 is the perfect, interesting example. Hope this subject appears on Fox News, soon.

Aw, I spent so much time researching Mr. Gowdy I’ve lost my interest in writing. The real lesson learned from Mr. Gowdy and others like him is “The Squeaky Wheel Gets Greased”. MSNBC and Fox, and others are now populated with “talky” politicians who never really did much but talk.

So be it, football is on. Hope I get good announcers….