Its time to talk about Trump. Donald Trump.
I’ve recreationally followed Trump for years, going back to his playboy years and marriages and scandals and Democratic activities. He was an interesting figure in New York State news, and then New Jersey news, and then reality television. As a poor man, I resented his seemingly easy path to not just untold riches but the utter and complete privilege so much wealth brings. Resented is the wrong word: I was jealous. As an anti-materialistic child of the 60s’s, the jealousy bothered me, as it revealed a desire for materialism buried deep down inside me, Oh…so for many years I was conflicted, I resented the jealousy, and was ashamed when I would admire his marital and material successes.

It feels good to confess the above, because it means I understand the man with out bias, with no preconceived notions, just a realization of exactly what he is, and isn’t.

In fact, it wasn’t even disconcerting when he changed parties, took out a full page ad asking for the Central Park Five to be executed, and pretended to be exorcised about Obama not being an American. Even when he became a candidate for President, it seemed natural. These actions are consistent with his need for attention, and his need to be heard. He did not have anything important to say, but he realized age and society were sapping his relevance, and gossip pages weren’t filling his needs, anymore. So he called attention to himself in the ways he knew and now the whole world talks about him every day. Every Hour. Every minute.

But why? You do have to admire the man for making the most of the little he was given in life. And he knew going full Mother Theresa in his later years was not for him.

Admiration. He deserves it for finding a plan and sticking to it. The plan has exceeded his wildest expectations: after calling attention to himself as president, he will have the best of both worlds after 2024. He’ll be president, again, and can pardon himself for all he has done and will do. Or he’ll lose the election but half the country will think he won, and his money and friends will keep him out of jail for all the things he has done and will do.

Genius.

And a golf clap to the American People for making it all work out.

A reader said I exaggerated the characters in the first Duh, making them look like stereotypical hicks. The reader is partly correct. Toothless really only has a partial upper plate. In the small locker room before and after he takes out the plate, puts it in a pink, plastic box, and clicks the box closed. I shouldn’t have to detail he did the reverse after his workouts. Why? Next time I see him I’ll ask and get back to everyone.

Comb over guy didn’t really have a comb-over. He just parted his hair starting at the top of his left ear and “styled” it all the way over to the top of his right ear. I’m told the style is called a Mid-Life Fade. It is not a difficult look to maintain (at least for a few moments) and in the locker room he was always pleased with himself after checking out the mirror. If there was an overhead mirror he might have thought differently.

There are probably many handsome, hirsute-y, intellectuals out there who might act the same, but the stereotype of who believes what he/she/them read on the internet is a meme because of anecdotal facts, not conjecture, in my world. (Note: anecdotal facts are the worst kind). The people I encounter who affirm publicly they are smarter than they are, are people who don’t have enough sense to take care of themselves, their teeth, their hairstyles, and their general outlook on the world. Sadly, this character–and his/her/them proclamations– have become the norm, especially in political courts of both colors. I say both colors to be fair, buy my own experience is with republicans/conservatives who are always right about a certain individual. No matter what. (See previous GMGA piece from last year.)

But it is a bad meme. I’ve known countless eccentrics, hillbillies, lazy-asses, and people who simply didn’t care how they look who were intelligent and humble more than normal. It is true you can’t tell a book by its cover, but it’s probably true, too, a bad cover probably represents a bad book.

Sorry I got lost on this…just tired. But if you ever want to proclaim in public how smart you are and how much more you know than anyone else, don’t.

The last piece I wrote about the United States of Duh was a little “ranty”. If we forget the sophistically complicated nature of discourse about fact and fiction, I still need to apologize for the basic “fact” overlooked in all serious discussions, including my article.

The fact overlooked: most people have no pride. Remember the quote about keeping your mouth shut to to remove all doubt? It does not seem to apply to Americans: they don’t care if they’re wrong and they don’t care who knows it.

How does any one reason with that?

Two guys were diatribing in my favorite gym about how foreign countries “don’t respect America, anymore.” One of the two had not replaced his teeth, yet, after his workout, and his conversational partner’s comb-over had come undone and I saw a chance to learn more about two gym guys in Upstate NY knowing how other countries feel about America. Apologies to smart people for how bullyish I sound in this discussion.

Me. “Have either of you been to another country? Talked to foreigners?”

Comb-over: “Yeah, I been to Madison.”

“Country, not county,” I had to say.

They both muttered something unrepeatable, but I pressed on: “Have you?”

Their sideways nods indicated they hadn’t.

I pressed on and asked how they know about the aforementioned disrespect. I got the Golden Answer of the uneducated.

“Everyone knows it,” said a combative Toothless. “Its all over the news.”

Amen.

PS Apologies for at least three “made-up” words. They sounded pertinentally important at the time.

A recent opinion poll showed half of Americans believe the stock market is in decline, the economy is bad, and unemployment in May of 2024 is at an all time high.

None of that is true. In fact, the opposite is true. The S and P is at an all time high, the economy is growing by 3% per quarter and unemployment is at an all time low. So what happened to that 50% of Americans who believe the untruth?

Citizens have abandoned their newspapers and legacy radio and television news programs, and have looked to the internet for information. Really, what they are looking for is “news” that fits their world view.

Here are some things citizens should consider:

Legacy media news organizations are just that: organizations. In all news offered by legacy media companies the news is investigated, analyzed, reviewed, and often edited by more than one individual, often times many eyes see the story before its offered to citizens. It delays news somewhat, but it also keeps one person’s opinions from being reported instead of the facts.

Not so, the internet. If you are educated and have some common sense, you can see how news reporting has gotten so bad: its mostly opinion, now, not fact.

It is so sad when you discuss a fact with someone and they spout internet shit without knowing what they are talking about. To all: if you don’t understand something, don’t repeat it, and DO NOT believe it. Ask. A famous man once said: “you’ll know you’re smart when you realize how much you don’t know.” Oh, and “better to keep your mouth closed and be thought a fool, that to open it and remove all doubt.”

Duh.

Certain legacy news organizations have seen this and to survive have joined the trend. Sadly, some have brazenly operated as opinion spewers instead of fact reporters and the ability to discern if a story is true is hard, especially if we don’t like what we hear.

It would behoove us all to abandon the interneters, twitters, tik tokers and the rest of the pod-casters and snake oil salesmen who spout dumb stories which become news as dumb citizens spread the false word.

Look to, and support news “organizations” with layers of review and get facts, rather than listen to a podcast full of opinion. We can debate the voracity of MSN versus Fox News next time. To be prepared to discuss both, it might be helpful to look up which one has been sued the most…and lost.

Next time.

But for now, stop believing shit you read on the internet.

The Great Relocation of 2024 (from NC to NY) has not gone as planned. Some good but some bad, too. It was never clear what would happen, or how things would go, so…meh.

Old friends in NY were supposed to be part of the future after the move. Yes, it might be more than a little misguided to think friends from 40-some years ago might still care to be friends, again, but I did not expect so many of them to be dead. Gone. No way to contact them.

One of the saddest was a really wonderful guy who’s phone number was hard to find. Last night, as I searched the internet for information, his obituary came up first. The sad part is he died 8 days ago after spending three months in the local hospital. I drove 760 miles to New York lived here for 33 days as of this writing, yet missed a connection to an old friend by less than a mile. (The distance from my Rome apartment to the hospital in which my old friend passed away. Eight days ago.)

Oddly, this all feels kind of humorous. Funny. Like the old joke about how to make God laugh.

Maybe late tonight, when I’m not sleeping, the weight of the loss will be heavier. Or I’ll feel it more when another medical professional asks me: “You live alone? Have any friends you can count on?” At a certain age, you lie to the medical people to keep from getting phone calls with strangers who say they care about you. Unless you really need that call.

For me, its off to other opportunities, other possibilities, other dramas, other illnesses, other losses. But with a renewed faith in the whimsical nature of a universe intent on being random, which means even at my age, something good is bound to happen.

In my last career as an Estate Planner, I worked with senior couples in the state of North Carolina. The majority of those couples had been together for decades, with one couple celebrating 70 years of marriage.

My own romantic life was turbulent, chaotic, and selfish until well into my 40s, with the reality of a single partner at one time becoming, finally, thankfully, the rule of my life from age 51 to the present 72. Selfishness was the main reason for all the turbulence/chaos, but so was a romantic ideal so unrealistic as to be dangerous: the concept of The One. The Hollywood movie “The One”. Sadly, I met about 20 of The Ones in my younger life. Oh, the humanity. And lawyer fees.

If we ignore the real world details of both my senior clients and my own life, does either lifestyle work best for our years leading to the end of life?

You can’t know how happy those old couples are really, and if they are unhappy its hard to blame a relationship since so much bad happens in our later years. There are too many variables: disease, dementia, arthritis, etc.

When 2023 fell apart for me, one of the casualties was the 20 year monogamous relationship that at one time I thought with all my heart would never, ever end. Again, no details, but as the 72 year old partner sees death in the road ahead, and the 63 year old partner can’t possibly understand that vision, its hard to see how the two could live together for the rest of his life. Or hers. Or both.

I’ve seen senior couples when one dies and the other doesn’t. It is one of the saddest things, ever, the loss of a love, a best friend, a partner of 40, 50, 60 years. Take 10 seconds and imagine it.

So in 2024 I made the choice to move 650 miles to a new state, be near daughters and grandchildren, and wait patiently for that which comes for all. And when it happens, these family members can be there.

But my partner of 20 years could not see how she could make the same choice.

In my new city I am not alone, but it feels like it.

After a long, hard, year it appears I’ve reached the other side of a really bad time.

Just in time to realize I’m 12 months closer to the end of it all.

In youth, not only is The End a very, very, very long way off, but the concept of recovery is central to the young man’s concept of invincibility. When I broke a leg, hurt a knee, twisted a neck, their was an awareness that taking time off and resting would take a few days, weeks, often just a few hours, and then life would be back to normal. A year later, life would go on as if nothing happened.

After 70, there is no such process. A week, a month, even a few days is not the panacea of the youthful, but the crossing off of days leading to the inevitable: there is no future where life would be back to normal “as if nothing ever happened”.

A famous, 70 year old comedian just said it best at his birthday: “nothing matters, it’ll all be over soon.”

Hm. The hardest part of knowing and accepting this is how to keep it from affecting the few, remaining, hours/days/months/years. And if things never get better, they do not stay the same so the only other option is how bad it can it get.

Watch, here, for some evidence of whether or not I learn to squeeze the maximum amount of joy out of the life left me.