Older Things Young People Don’t Care about and I’m Not Holding My Breath

In the last month I purchased a new tv, picked up some medications, added some shelving to the bedroom, and transferred a CD at my credit union. There wasn’t a single document for any of these transactions that could be read with the older, naked eye… even with “readers”* and a hand-held magnifying glass. It’s possible my checking account now contains a vitamin D supplement. Assembling the shelf required a chair, three light sources, the magnifying glass, and an hour nap upon completion. My particular situation may be different from others due to The Calamities, but it needs to be asked: Why is print so small, and getting smaller? And does anyone know what contrast means? Often light black type is used with a light gray background, especially online. It is aging, I know, since after typing in size 12 Times New Roman for 60 years, the size of this post is 14 Liberation Serif…at least until published.** But size 20 is easily “seen” (pun?) in the future.

I need a pill cutter/splitter. Never has there been a need, urge, or even a mistaken opportunity to use that phrase until August 17, 2025. Good or bad? Since it’s such a new subject, wonder if any young person DOES need a pill cutter/splitter…for any legal reason, anyway.

Altering any physical position is an adventure. Political, emotional, and life positions are still very welcome to change, and often do, without warning. But—in old age–arising to the vertical from a horizontal requires timing and advance preparation if a smidgen of grace and personal honor are to be maintained. (Or artfully exhibited?) Even going from vertical to horizontal is a challenge, too, if in public or anyone is watching. What is done in the privacy of one’s home need not be revealed, but the word “plop” may convey an accurate image. Even then, good eyesight and correct aim are required. (See first paragraph.) And—for the readers sake—there will be no mention of public toilets.

Writing a post like this could happen daily, if one lets it. Seniors are the most persecuted, ignored, and scammed cohort of people in America, and possibly the world. (With the exception of maybe, babies. Is that spoonful of mashed peas really an airplane coming in for a landing?) So letting others know how bad we have it becomes a daily routine, as if it never happened to anyone before and the challenges are all new, seen by us for the first time in this world.

But nothing is ever new and neither are our complaints. The only comfort we can take from our constant listing of grievances is that even those who don’t listen to us will understand eventually, if they’re lucky enough.

So why still complain? As the great Doctor Wright says: “If everything seems to be going good, you have obviously overlooked something.” And I needed to post a piece. It’s been awhile. And I’m tired of Trump stuff. Aren’t you?

*eye helpers placed all over the places we occupy because we can’t keep track of one pair.

** I’ve no idea the size or readability of this post after publication, when you read it. My laptop is set to enlarge everything, and my phone display only goes so big, so…if you have a complaint about readability, sit on it. No one cares.

Older Life Tips. Not OLD, Older…

Life doesn’t get easier with age. Here are some thoughts.

My eyesight is great, even with Age-Related Macular Degeneration (AMD). AMD slowly robs your central vision…if left untreated. Get an “Ainsler Grid”, or simple sheet of lined graph paper, and tape either one to your refrigerator door. Look at it often, one eye at a time, and if any of the lines get wavy, get to an Ophthalmologist as soon as possible. An optometrist might be able to diagnose your AMD but he/she couldn’t treat it, so get to an OPHTHALMOLOGIST. If the word is too long, google “Retina Specialists” in your area. Of note, learn the difference in eye medical professionals.

Vision is great but not young. I suffer from the standard old age loss of “elasticity” in over 70-year-old eyeballs and need help with fine print. Like the smaller and smaller instructions on Tyson chicken about how to cook it. Or how to take prescriptions. You can buy “reader” glasses almost anywhere or pay your optometrist (sic, learn) for a fancy pair but if you’re like the rest of us who use them only for reading, you’ll need several pair (I have 10) spread around the house and car. They get lost, often, as if they have legs. Most often they’re lost on our heads. Since you need so many pairs, you don’t want to pay a high price for them. Dollar Stores have “trees” and trees of $1 readers in any magnification you need. They are just small magnifying glasses. The dollar store models really should not be called glasses because they are made of plastic. They work perfectly if you don’t scratch them, and if you do, buy another bunch. Like 10? My eyes were getting a little fuzzy, one time, and it made me wonder if my eyes were getting worse. Maybe a higher magnification? Thankfully, I was smart enough to see it was the plastic lenses getting “foggy”, not my eyes. A moist wipe didn’t clear them up, so I planned a dollar store trip to get cleaner, new ones. Google it! Yes, I did and after dropping all my foggy plastic glasses into warm water with a little dish soap, wiping with a paper towel, and letting them dry,—voila!–my eyesight returned to normal. Sadly, I was both pleased with myself, but angry it took ten years, and google, to learn how to clean “plastics”. Hope this one helps someone.

Try to remember the world is getting less and less interested in you and what you have to say. It shouldn’t need to be mentioned, here, but…life has passed us by. Get over it. If you pay too much attention to car and beer commercials, you’ll get depressed. For comfort, enjoy the prescription drug commercials: they are meant for us and young people with problems. But do not think the drug companies care about you, they want money. And, yes, young people do have problems but don’t “help” them by pointing it out…unless they ask and even then, be careful

Recent conversations with younger and older people have reminded me of how complex, diverse, exciting, and possibly fulfilling our old lives have been . If you feel bad about being passed by and rejected by modern society, close the blinds, turn off all electronic devices, and revisit your past. If we can remember our pasts, every one of us achieved something, saved something, earned something, did something, or otherwise enjoyed the heck out of our lives in those long-ago years. Celebrate it all. Blow your horn. But to yourself. Write it down, Record it with video or voice. Besides the self-therapy aspect of letting it out, imagine how much everyone else will miss you when they read about your life and what you’ve done, what you’ve accomplished, what you have survived.

And that’s a good place to end: The End. If you reached a certain age, especially if you’ve made it longer than the average life expectancy or lived longer than your parents: Woo Hoo! Champagne for all.

But let the kids pay for it. And don’t drink too much.