Every minute of every day I search for something life is giving back to me in exchange for all it is taking. Any man in his golden years (and probably women, too) will tell (or bore you, endlessly) about the changes to sleeping habits, eating habits, work out habits, and sex habits linked to old age. Worse, the changes do not happen in one moment, but over time, gradually, so we don’t really notice how bad our eyes are until we can no longer read the cooking directions on the frozen pizza label.

So where are the benefits we get in exchange for the lost functions and features? We have to be alert for them, but they are there.

One, for example, is a learned patience for the lack of common sense shown by American Business. Inefficiency used to drive me crazy. Waste used to make my skin crawl. An inability to accurately communicate made me apoplectic. (A favorite word, finally used!)

Thankfully, the new/old me is more relaxed, calm, and understanding. Growing old blesses us with an attitude meant to stop the bursting of blood vessels! It isn’t a learned patience as much as a gradual wearing down of the sharp edge of what used to constructive criticism. “I’ve seen it all” doesn’t mean I’m finally okay with it “all”, but means there’s so much to see, no new misfortune is worth getting excited about. (Wait, wouldn’t it be another loss?)

To wit: I walk into my favorite hardware store with an empty LP barbecue tank.

New (to me) Clerk: “What can I help you with?”

Me: “Need some gas for the barbecue.” I hold up the 33 pound, aluminum tank digging into my right palm.

Clerk: “Want us to refill your tank with our gas or do an exchange for a full one?”

Me. “Whatever is cheapest.”

Clerk: “That would be a refill. $17.99.”

Me: “Okay.” I head outside where the refill station is located.

Clerk: “Sorry. We’re out of gas.”

It felt like an Abbott and Costello routine. (Young readers, look it up. Google “Who’s on First?”)

Note, also, as we talk about business practices, there is a company selling frozen pizza’s with heating instructions so small a large segment of the pizza company’s market can not read the directions.

Crap, how could I have missed it? The pizza company also sells magnifying glasses.

Now, THAT is good business.